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I must be saved,” grabs a pack and jumps.The Pope turns to the Boy Scout. “My son, I have lived a ling, full life. Take the other parachute and save yourself.”The Boy Scout just smiles. “Don’t worry, Your Holiness. The world’s smartest man just jumped out of the plane wearing my backpack!”The following items are compliments of J & B.After the brief Falkland Islands war, a British regiment commander was addressing some troops under his command who had heroically performed above and beyond the call of duty. He informed them that Her Majesty’s Army had committed to reward each of the three soldiers 100 pounds per inch of distance between two different parts of the man’s body.The commander addressed the first soldier, “Where would you like to be measured, Sergeant?”“From the tip of me head to the soles of me feet, Sir!”, he replied.“Very good!”, the commander said, and the sergeant was measured at 6’5”. He was paid the handsome sum of 7000 pounds.The second soldier was asked, “What about. But instead of serving it the way Karla had the day before, the girl dropped smoothly to her knees to serve, then smoothly rose again to go to the next man. Karla inwardly winced as she realized the torture to which the girl was so willingly subjecting herself.Seeing Maria’s lacerations, Wilhelm asked kindly, “What happened to you, Miss?”With her eyes shining Maria replied, “I, too, have entered the service of Kendy Company. I am the junior slave. And, sir, I was given the joy of attending to my mistress, Karla, during her torture. She was utterly exquisite, as I’m sure you agree. Her heroism is utterly without parallel in our country’s history.”“That’s certainly true enough,” Wilhelm said. Then to Klink he said, “Stefan, you called it. I apologize. When you told me that Karla requested a set of whips, I thought you had lost your marbles. Clearly, you had not. Everything you feared might happen already has, I’m afraid.” Then looking at his colleagues he inquired, “Well, since we’re.
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